Movies - Funny Parenting Stories for Fathers (and Mothers)

Masters of the Universe Comes out in June; He-Man is Back

While I was minding my own business last week, I learned “Masters of the Universe” will hit theatres this June. My brother and I collected “Masters of the Universe” figures when we were younger. Castle Grayskull was a birthday present when I turned 7. I was one of the many kids who loved playing with the MOTU action figures. He-Man came out around the time “Return of the Jedi” was released in movie theatres, and I think the heroes of Eternia may have been overshadowed by the long-awaited finale to the “Star Wars” trilogy.

Proud members of Generation X, me included, are looking forward to this release, even if it is with some trepidation. Something that hearkens back to happier, simpler days of childhood runs the risk of being ruined by a director’s interpretation. The director in this case is Travis Knight, who directed 2018’s “Bumblebee”. Okay, Travis. Don’t screw this up. A lot of Gen-Xers are hoping you get this right.

The story of He-Man

If you’re not familiar with the story of He-Man, let me bring you up to speed on the action figures that filled my room and the cartoon that saw me off to school. Mild-mannered (and sometimes klutzy) Prince Adam lives in Eternia with his pet tiger Cringer. He spends his days with Duncan in the castle’s repair shop and Duncan’s daughter, Teela, who is in charge of the king and queen’s guard. Eternia is the setting of Castle Grayskull. The secrets of Eternia are hidden and protected inside the castle. He-Man and his cohorts, including the Sorceress, pledge to protect Castle Grayskull and its secrets from Skeletor (played by Jared Leto), He-Man’s archenemy.

The jaw bridge to Castle Grayskull could be locked and unlocked by joining the swords of He-Man and Skeletor, adding to the stakes of every battle they fought directly with each other. A common plot was one of Skeletor’s confederates plotting to steal He-Man’s sword so Skeletor could open the gates of Castle Grayskull and rule over Eternia. Skeletor also practiced magic and tried to cast spells over Eternia in his quest.

The First He-Man Movie

A live-action movie was made in 1987. Dolph Lundgren played He-Man and Courtney Cox played a damsel in distress. For me, the movie stayed true to the basic narrative of the original storyline. One deviation featured Gwildor, a locksmith who invented a key that could open portals to different dimensions. I always though Gwildor was supposed to be Orko (If you know, you know), but it was impossible to have someone floating around the air in a live-action movie in 1987.

The movie was good in my opinion. I think any MOTU fans would be happy with what they saw on the big screen. He-Man wasn’t as popular as it had been when the movie came out, but that didn’t stop me and my friends from enjoying it. My brother and I liked seeing something we enjoyed playing featured in the cinema.

My brother and I got older and moved on to other interests. Our action figures, Castle Grayskull, Road Ripper, as well as various He-Man storybooks and accessories were replaced with other things that took their place in our bedroom and basement.

This version of the story straddles the present-day world and the fantasy Eternia. Cringer is in the movie. You’ll see Duncan, Teela, Evil-Lyn, and the Sorceress. I may or may not have seen Beast Man as I researched the movie. Fans will recognize the featured characters. I’m sure there will be new ones created for this movie. I’ll be alright with that as long as the storyline isn’t altered to fit them in.

A Stay at Home Dad gets Sick

I was out of commission for a couple of days last week. I’m not sure what hit me, but it wasn’t pleasant. Stomachaches, nausea, chills. A lot of things that didn’t make for pleasant mornings or pleasant days. I was able to put on my “big boy” pants long enough during the day to get some things done around the house, but once dinner was almost done, I needed to tap out and go to bed. I hated that because the porkchops I had cooked smelled good.

I proceeded to spend the following day in bed. I fell asleep, woke up, found some games to play, answered messages from adoring fans. It was nice. Wife held it down for me during my brief convalescence. She took the kids to school in the morning. If she tried to wake me, I didn’t notice. I was out of it.

It was how I spent the first day of being sick: Being in and out of sleep, trying to stay warm Wishing I could be well enough to at least drink something. I wasn’t hungry but I was thirsty. I tried to drink some coffee but it didn’t agree with me and I had to quit after a couple of sips.

I was however, able to drink tea and, before I went down to the count, I noticed I was feeling a little off and bought a couple of bottles of iced green tea to help me fight through whatever it was that was coming on to me.

Everyone was glad to have me back. Not because they love me or my cooking, though.

It wasn’t exactly an ideal situation. I couldn’t stand. Couldn’t walk. Laundry and dishes piling up. I wondered about the pick-ups and drop-offs and Wife’s schedule. She was able to get it done for me and I was very grateful for that.

I was starting to feel better the next day. I was able to drink a cup of coffee. I allowed myself some toast. I was hungry but was still feeling a little more delicate than I normally am. The kids were at school so I allowed myself to go downstairs.

While I was in recovery mode, I took the time to check out some selections from my DVD library to pass the time. It was only a short time, so I was only able to watch two movies. I watched “L.A. Confidential” and the original “Death Wish”. There’s a ton of movies I’ve been wanting to see and haven’t gotten around to. (No, I hadn’t seen those two and I know how old they are). Needing to be off my feet and take it easy gave me the chance to watch them.

Watching these movies was a nice way of taking it easy for a day or two. I was soon feeling well enough to return to my father and husband duties and cook and clean. Everyone was glad to have me back. Not because they love me or my cooking, though. They were glad to have me back to helping with the chores.

What Happens when the Stay-at-Home Parent gets Sick

I was out of commission for a couple of days last week. Not fun when the stay-at-home-parent gets sick. I’m not sure what hit me, but it wasn’t pleasant. Stomachaches, nausea, chills. A lot of things that didn’t make for pleasant mornings or pleasant days in general. I was able to put on my “big boy” pants long enough during the day to get some things done around the house, but once I finished cooking, I needed to tap out and go to bed. That was bad because the porkchops I had cooked smelled good.

Sick in Bed

That was how I spent the first day of being sick: Being in and out of sleep, trying to stay warm. Wishing I could be well enough to at least drink something. I wasn’t hungry but I was thirsty. My morning coffee didn’t agree with me, and I had to quit after a couple of sips.

I was, however, able to drink tea and, before I went down to the count, I noticed I was feeling a little off and bought a couple of bottles of iced green tea to help me fight through whatever it was that was coming on to me.

Everyone was glad to have me back. Not because they love me or my cooking, though.

It wasn’t exactly an ideal situation. I couldn’t stand. Couldn’t walk. Laundry and dishes were piling up. I wondered about the pick-ups and drop-offs and Wife’s schedule. She was able to get it done for me and I was very grateful for that.

Daddy in Recovery

I was starting to feel better the next day and was able to drink a cup of coffee. I allowed myself some toast. Daddy was hungry but was still feeling a little more delicate than usual. The kids were at school, so I allowed myself to go downstairs.

I took the time to check out some selections from my DVD library to pass the time while I was in recovery mode. It was only a short time, so I was only able to watch two movies. I watched “L.A. Confidential” and the original “Death Wish”. I’ve been wanting to watch a lot of movies that I haven’t gotten around to. (No, I hadn’t seen those two and I know how old they are). Needing to be off my feet and take it easy gave me the chance to watch them.

My book, “Down on the Farm”, is available for purchase on Apple Books.

Film Lesson

Monday through Friday is for schoolwork. You’ve read about the drama. You’ve read about the running and the yelling. The blood, sweat, and tears that produce a sentence with a word-count that fits on one hand.

On Friday, we celebrate the end of the week with Movie Night. Movie Night happens on Friday and Saturday Nights. We have spent the past few weeks working through the “Avengers” franchise. Good movies. The Boy picked Pokémon. I didn’t think it was terrible. Some members of the household have respectfully disagreed.

My turn to pick a movie is coming. Some members of The Gaggle have dreaded this. I have discussed movies with them from time to time. I love movies. I love talking about them, referencing them, and quoting them. I love all types of movies. On Halloween for example, The Oppressed and The Boy love watching “Frankenstein” and “Dracula”. They are old movies, but the children love them nonetheless.

For one of The Gaggle, a movie being old is reason enough to not watch it. Anything made more than 10 years ago is too old and not worth her time. She says the main problem is me being too old and that is why I can’t pick a good movie. Movies that I think are good (“The Magnificent Seven”) are really bad, and if I pick a terrible (“old”) movie, (“Chinatown”), she will go to her room and not come out.

This has been a point of contention between the two of us. Everything about me is old: My movies. My music. I’m old. She calls me, “Boomer”. Delightful child.

I could educate her about movies but that would mean stepping away from the daily house and homework duties. Wife is working 20 hours a day and the children think this is one big vacation for them. Their daily chores only get in the way of that. A break would be nice. I guess there’s always Movie Night.